Forest Green Turtleneck Society

I have often seen members of the Red Hat Society out and about and have been amused by their red hats and purple outfits. I love the absurdity of it: a group of women who are unconcerned about their looks, about how society may view the way they dress, and are just out enjoying themselves. I've always said that some day, when I'm old enough, I'm going to join the Red Hats.

As I was looking at their website one day, I saw that I might possibly be old enough. While most Red Hatters are over 50, there are some who are younger. And I went, "Uh... wow. I'm maybe old enough to join." And then I started to go through a crisis. Yes, I want to be able to join the Red Hats some day. But... I'm only 42! And that seems too young to join the Red Hats. I was thinking that I would be ready to join when I turned 50 but I could maybe join now. It would give me an opportunity to meet and make friends with other like-minded women and I have missed having friends to hang out with. On the other hand, I have in my mind this perception that Red Hatters were much older than me and the fact that they're not, well, that kinda freaks me out.

So I was looking online to see if I could find a local chapter but the Red Hats keep chapter information very quiet. As I was looking, I stumbled across a group called The Blue Thong Society. Um... okay? The Blue Thong Society is kind of the antithesis of Red Hat, trying to stay young and hip and trendy as they age. Their motto? "Fight Frump!" Well. I don't want to be frumpy but I see the Red Hat group as being silly in their frumpiness, not that they were throwing in the towel and succumbing to a life of elastic-waisted polyester supreme pants and sweatshirts with little kitties on them or going about in hair curlers and mumuus because they can't be bothered to dress better. I'm sure that the members of the Blue Thong Group are probably nicer than that but first impression? Not such a good one.

Lying in bed with Brad last night, I mentioned both groups to him and said, "I feel like I fall smack dab in the middle of the two groups. I'm not sure Blue Thong is right for me but I'm not quite ready for Red Hatters, either. What would be the middle between blue thongs and red hats? Is it yellow jumpers? Forest green turtlenecks? Orange stars? Pink hearts?"

I've been racking my brain for a long time, trying to figure out how to meet and make friends with others. Alas, I have no crafty sorts of abilities so hanging out with crafters is not an option and I'm not going to join a book club because I'm very fussy about the books I read. Where does a 42-year old woman go these days to make friends?

If you have any ideas, let me know. Otherwise, I think I'll be down the street at the local watering hole, eyeing other women and working on pick-up lines: "Hey little lady, wanna come back to my place and play Scrabble and look at pictures of my kids?"